« January 2006 | Main | August 2006 »
March 26, 2006
Perseverance
What a great and new day yesterday was. Willik started football (soccer) with the Woodhaven Soccer Club yesterday. Glaucia wrote about it in her blog. Willik hurt himself a few times during the game. He kept jumping feet first toward the ball, but was usually beat to the ball by the mob of kids surrounding the ball. That just left him lying on the ground with kids tripping over him. At one point, he had a little blood and snot mixture coming out of his nose -- not to mention his tears. This was his first real introduction to the "rat race." He was thrown into a world where everyone is after the same thing and nobody is going to wait for you to get up before they move on. He is so used to being able to feel a sense of control over the "issues" of his life. He had a real wake-up call yesterday.
Prior to yesterday's bonanza, he was very excited about soccer. He envisioned having full access to the ball, kicking it every time into the goal. What he got was a few glimpses of the ball, an occasional brush of it on his foot, trampling on by a mob, and about three good kicks.
He was crying, telling us he didn't want to play any more. It was a very critical moment in his life - and mine as a father. I could see in his eyes that he couldn't understand the point of continuing. He could kick the ball all he wanted if it was just him, Phoenix, and dad. Why fight over the ball with a bunch of kids he's never met before? In the comfort of his grandparents' backyard, he could be a superstar. He pleaded with us to bring him home. He even left the field, crying. At this moment, I'm starting to tread new waters. I didn't want to be cold-hearted and yell at him, "Quit being a big baby and get back out there!" I also didn't want to cater to his near-sightedness by letting him get away with quitting. It would have been easy to tell myself that maybe he's not ready for this and we could try it again next year. I had a deep, strong feeling that if we quit, we'd be setting a standard of quitting for the rest of his life.
We told him to keep playing. It's okay if he doesn't kick the ball into the goal, or even if he doesn't kick the ball at all. I told him to stay on his feet and to stop jumping feet first at the ball. And if he falls, get up as soon as possible. He got back in and did all of that. He jumped a couple of times at the ball, but not as much and only out of habit (I guess that's something he does at school). He didn't cry any more. We all cheered for him very loudly.
After his time on the field, we told him how proud we were of him. He kept asking me yesterday why I was proud of him for getting hurt and for only kicking the ball seven times -- who knows where he came up with that number. I told him that I was proud of him for playing and not quitting. He doesn't have to score points for me to be proud. I told him that it doesn't feel strong when you are hurt and getting back up, but it is strong and makes you stronger.
Since yesterday, he's been saying how much he loves me. He keeps hugging me. I can see a sense of security in his eyes. I actually have no idea how he is feeling. I am so thankful that I have this opportunity to build up a future man. Just when parenting has been feeling like "Stop fighting!" "Don't do that!" "Go sit in your room!", God revealed a new part of it to me. This is a learning experience for me just as much as for him. I remember messing up often in sports as a kid, but instead of encouragement to keep going I was laughed at by my older cousins. I quit every extra-curricular activity after that, because I was allowed to quit. I quit the boy scouts the moment it became challenging. I quit basketball, track and field, cross country, musical instruments. I cannot remember a single activity I followed through with as a young person. The first challenging "event" I remember actually finishing without quitting was boot camp for the Marine Corps. That was a miracle, because I was ready to quit many times during boot camp.
All the glory and honor goes to God, who is leading me by the hand every day, showing me how to be a father to my boys.
- Hebrews 12:1-3
- Therefore, since we have so great a cloud of witnesses surrounding us, let us also lay aside every encumbrance and the sin which so easily entangles us, and let us run with endurance the race that is set before us, fixing our eyes on Jesus, the author and perfecter of faith, who for the joy set before Him endured the cross, despising the shame, and has sat down at the right hand of the throne of God. For consider Him who has endured such hostility by sinners against Himself, so that you will not grow weary and lose heart.
Posted by fabijo at 11:23 PM | Comments (5)
March 10, 2006
eBay fun
Last week, my first ebay auction ended. Congratulations to my uncle for making the winning bid. I've been working hard all week, trying to do all my class work from my online school, and also using ALOT of time (probably too much) working on the perfect thank you certificate for my uncle. For all of you who didn't want to buy my personalized thank you, this is what you missed:
Posted by fabijo at 10:06 PM | Comments (3)
March 05, 2006
Online School
I'm enrolled at Baker College. I'm towards the end of my first class called College Success Online. Wow, has it been overwhelming. I thought online school would be just reading, watching videos, and submitting assignments. They expect much more out of you. I need to "participate" at least 5 out of 7 days a week. Participating is contributing real discussions and ideas to the class discussion board. Part of many assignments is to not only do your part, but to read other people's submissions and comment on theirs. So, not only do I have plenty class material to read, plenty to work on for my homework, but I also need to spend time reading other people's homework -- and then comment on it. My grade is affected by my participating or lack of participation.
All of that just to say to all of you considering online school - beware. If you have a steady enough schedule to attend college locally, do it. It is much easier to sit in class twice a week (part time school), than to put so much effort in every day of the week reading what other students have submitted as their homework. I only enrolled in school to get a Computer Science degree, not a teacher's. I have to admit, though, that I like getting feedback from other students on my homework. I believe in the idea that feedback from more people other than the teacher helps me to get a better picture of myself. I just don't have the time to devote to giving feedback on the other students' work.
Maybe other online schools aren't as time-demanding as Baker. I like the price of Baker College. Also, this is just the first class. I'm hoping that taking other classes that actually relate to my field of study will grab my attention more. This class has been full of learning about time management, planning life goals, working in groups, and even creating a mission statement for my life. All of those subjects are things I've been thinking I need to try to implement personally. A couple of them are also very unlike me. I'm not a planner, so anything that involves planning has the tendency of paralyzing and frustrating me. I've been trying to work on that, but to have all of it thrown at me within just two or three weeks has really hit me hard. I guess I would update my above statement to say that if you are a good planner, online school might not be a bad idea for you!
Posted by fabijo at 10:49 PM | Comments (4)